What’s up, what’s up, what is up? And welcome to the Dr. Ali Griffith Show: Mindset, Meditation, and Motivation. What are some of the biggest mistakes that I see people make that affect their results? I know you’re ready to hear it, so stay tuned and I’ll go through all of the details of what are some of the mistakes that I constantly see that affects results.
So today we are speaking about results and the things that we do that we want to see, the results that we want to see, right? You get up in the morning and everyone has certain intentions and from the intentions you want to get results. Now, a lot of my clients come to me because they’re always questioning, “Dr. Ali, how is it that you are getting these fast results where you just literally started a business a few years ago and now we’re seeing you everywhere. We’re seeing, you know, constant movement and constant results,” in terms of what I’m doing, whether it’s parenting, whether it’s business or if it’s just me in general. I’ve always been a person that reaps fast results. Now what I gave you, and I can show you that in a different video or podcast, is what I have done to create the results, but I’ve never shared with you what I see that are mistakes that are people making to create the results that they want. So today we’re going to share all about some of those mistakes that I see.
Mistake #1: Doubting yourself.
The first mistake I see is first people doubt themselves. You’re constantly doubt yourself. I know for me, at the beginning when I start any new project, the first thing that comes into my mind is often “you can’t do this” or “what will happen if you fail?” or “that just sounds silly”. Like I literally talked myself out of every idea that I have before even moving, and I spent some time there. Now before in time when I was younger, when I didn’t know better, I would actually spend a very, very long real estate in there. And when I say a long real estate, meaning I have let ideas that I’ve had sit on me for one year, five year, 10 years, 20 years, even to the point where I just talked myself out of it. To where it was a great idea when it first came up, and then the self doubt came in and all the negative things came in and I completely said, “okay, well I’m not doing it because I already saw the end and the end is not exactly what I want.”
So that began to be one of the mistakes that I was doing, and what I realized when I speak to my clients and I’m helping them through their blocks, or through their not making action, is they are constantly doubting themselves. Possibly from other failures that have happened, possibly from what they’ve heard, possibly from just their own negativity that lets them question whether they can get it done, or just simply fear. So when we continue to doubt ourselves, when we continue to talk ourselves out of things, then that affects the results. Like how do they expect to get fast results if we’re going to talk ourselves out of it?
Mistake #2: Worrying too much about what others might think.
The second thing, biggest mixing mistake I see people make is they’re constantly willing to listen to others. Like they’re listening to what others say, and guess what? We’re also listening to what they don’t say. So we’re waiting to hear, “oh, that was great,” or “that was not great.” We’ll put something out there and then we’ll do the – we’ll bring our ears towards because we want to know what is it that they feel. We’re listening. We’re listening to if they say negative, and then when they say negative, we’re going to jump on that, “well you know, I did think it wasn’t a good idea,” or, “you know, maybe I did make many mistakes.” And or, we’re listening to the positive. Like we’re waiting. We’re just waiting and listening and allowing whatever they’re saying to be the primary reason if we’re continue or not continue.
Mistake #3: Expecting fast results.
The third thing, I see this too a lot, is we expect fast results immediately. Like we want Burger King right away. We want to put it out there and we want a million hits. We want to start something and reach the the final point immediately. And I had to learn that life doesn’t happen like that. Like nothing I’ve earned happens over night. When I went to do my martial arts studies, I started at white belt and I had to train and I had to go through to the next level. You know, for us it was the yellow belt, and then moving through to the next level. So there are always steps and levels and things that you have to get through – the falls, the rises, the different moments where it’s just part of the process. When I had Steve Harvey as our coach during our Act Like a Success, he said, “many people want to jump in and just take the elevator straight to the Penthouse, not realizing that you’ve got to walk the steps to get up there and that the penthouse isn’t exactly floor level two, or three, or even five or six. It’s often a huge number.” So if you want to get to the penthouse, or you want to get to your final destination and if you want results that happen faster than others, you have to expect that it’s not going to happen immediately.
And that is one of the biggest mistakes I see too often and I am guilty of that myself. You know, we’d comment from this fast paced society where everything is technologically advanced, then we want to be technically technologically advanced. Then we want to go ahead and do something and it’ll download immediately or uploaded immediately, and in reality that is just not true. And if we keep expecting – if I keep expecting it – you keep expecting for things to happen immediately, then guess what? We are going to constantly be disappointed because immediate is not the not the road too fast results. Immediate is not the road to success. What is the road is taking our time and that leads to the next biggest mistake.
Mistake #4: Failing to plan.
Another big mistake we make is we don’t plan. If you fail to plan then you’re literally planning to fail. So we have to understand where it is we want to go. Like if we’re getting into a car and we know our final destination, then we’re looking at what are some of the steps that we have to pass through or the places we have to go to get to our final destination? We don’t just jump into the car and guess what, blink we’ve arrived. That doesn’t happen. So why do you think it’s going to happen in terms of your parenting success? Why do you think it’s going to happen in terms of your business success? I had such a rude awakening when I realized that everything that I put my hands to required a plan. It required strategic action. It required not just wishing and thinking and lots of wing it. You know, like when you think you’ll just go to the store and give them a dollar and all of a sudden you’ll become a millionaire.
Uhh, reality?? That doesn’t happen to all of us. That’s like a tiny, minuscule drop of a person that that will happen too. And even for those people, those are people who may have been playing it for years now. Understanding that we need to make a plan, we need to make a plan, we need to create a plan, will allow us to start seeing whether we are moving in the direction that we want to go. It allows us checks and balances. It allowed me a place where when things didn’t go the way I wanted it to go, then I had something, a roadmap to go back and look at it and see, okay, where could I have done something different? What can I do? How do I recalculate where it is that I want to go? And having a solid plan, a strategic plan helps in that process.
Now if you don’t want to get the fast results, then don’t plan. Just get up there and just blink it away. But if you’re looking for those fast results like I am, like you are, like most families or moms with children with autism or special needs, or just moms in general who just don’t have the time – you want to make sure that you don’t make these mistakes that I have made repeatedly. Created a plan.
Mistake #5: Not getting help.
The last thing I’m going to share for you is not getting help. Like that’s a huge, huge mistake. I think that that should be like the biggest one of it all. Here we are with this “I can do it myself” attitude that I don’t need help to parent. I don’t need help to start my own business and have a successful business. Guess what? I need help. I had to learn that everything that I do, create that plan and know where is it that I’m going to need help.
When I see myself fall, when I see myself not show up the way I know I’m supposed to show up, then I get help. I have my coaches, I have my mentors, I have different people that I will reach to when I am at the lowest. I even when I’m the highest, even when I’m at the highest, I’m constantly asking for help. Because what I realized is when we ask for help, when we reach out to others and let them know, “hey, you too can be part of this process,” then we get better results. Then we get the things that we want to see happen. We see it happen even faster because guess what? If you think about it, it’s collective energy. And if I’m doing it by myself, then I’m just the only sole force of energy. If I have others that are giving me help and helping me along the way, then I have now found a way that I can have collective energy with others who believe or want the same thing, helping me towards that process.
So this is Dr. Ali Griffith’s Mindset, Meditation and Motivation show. I appreciate you subscribing. I appreciate you leaving your rates and reviews and helping us to become a success. Now don’t stay here, drop back and listen to another one of my Dr. Ali Griffith Shows. There’s so many and they can keep you moving. And if you’re at that state where you just actually need to take a pause and to breathe, then you need to take or listen to the au-meditation moments. Thank you, and I’ll catch you next time. And remember in all that you do, be au-amazing in your thoughts, your words, and in your actions.
This is a transcription of The Dr. Ali Griffith Show. If you’d like to listen to this episode and others you can do so here: bit.ly/dralishow
P.S. My nonprofit Smart Fit Fam is hosting our 5th annual Smart Fit Family Fitness Fun Day on July 28th and I’d love for you to attend! This is a free event for ALL to attend (especially special needs families!). We’ll have lots of fun activities, including limbo, potato sack races, egg and spoon races, face painting, dancing, and so many more wellness/fitness activities, games, and food. The event will be at the Wyckoff Farmhouse Museum in Brooklyn, NY from 11am-4pm. It’s totally free to attend! Check it out and get your tickets here: bit.ly/fifthfitfun