So today I wanted to talk a little about minding your business. Mind your business actually was a topic that was brought up before for the Power House of Four with three other au-mazing ladies that we have found each other in the personal development space. We had this show where “mind your business” just came up and it was a hot topic. So I’m like, you know what, let’s revisit that and now let’s add that Dr. Ali spin on it.
The concept came from being into everyone else’s business more than you are on your own. You know, some of you who love to help, help, help others, and then when it comes to doing your own stuff you’re like, “I have no more energy. I have no more power. There’s nothing left inside of me. I’m just going to take a nap.” I’m one of those because as a servant leader, it’s so, so important for me and I actually enjoy helping others. It’s what I live, breathe and just get excited about. It’s like hearing that you need help and “how can I support you?” is always my response. I’m thinking initially that that was what I needed to do to feel better about myself. I guess I helped myself through whatever downward spiral or whatever of rabbit hole I was in. There’s nothing like helping others to make you feel better. I was actually telling a client one of that that the other night when she was asking, um, how do I feel better? I was like, “help others!”
You know, there’s something about helping those that have less, the less fortunate ones. That’s the reason I have my nonprofit Smart Fit Fam. When I’m working with families with kids with special needs or I’m working with autism, it just makes me feel more grateful. But while I’m doing that, I’m, I’m minding my business and I need you to think about that right now as you’re helping others.
Are you putting in the same amount of energy, time and money into yours as you do for others? I mean, you’ve seen me jump in a plane to go to Lisa Nichols events or Steve Harvey’s event, or my different coaches in different ways supporting them. But am I also investing that time and money into myself, into my business, into my podcast The Dr. Ali Griffith Show (subscribe!), into this Mompreneurs on Fire 2.0 live event (get tickets!). The answer is initially no, but somehow I found the way. So let me let you know a little bit about how I found the way.
Tip #1: Be clear on what you want.
First I had to learn that if I wanted something I had to be clear on exactly what it is that I want, and if I wasn’t clear to surround myself with others that were moving in the same direction. So even though it may not have looked like I was minding my business, it was actually the behind the scenes building up the infrastructure, then seeing how it’s run for when I do my own. So it actually was minding my business still. It was just a strategic manner of supporting others while learning in preparation for where I was going. Now many of us don’t see us doing that and we don’t actually see the next five years or 10 years when we’re in the actual process. One of my gifts is the ability to see beyond the immediate, and as I’m supporting others, I support myself. As I’m helping my different coaches with either a live event, now I’m doing my live event and now I have some of the basic infrastructures of the back end of doing a live event and the front end of doing a live event from helping others. So it’s a way of still moving towards your dreams, minding your business from the back end side. So look at how you can now find a way that you can support someone else. That support can be helping in the same room, get coaching and being in alignment of someone else that is five to 10 steps ahead of you so that you are still always learning the process of where you want to go. That’s why you have to get clear on where you want to go. If you’re not clear on that, set up a time for us to talk one quick coaching session with me and we’ll get you clarity at bit.ly/chatcreate.
Tip #2: Focus less on what others are doing.
The second thing we want to do is we want to focus less on what others are doing. I like to call this putting my blinders on. A lot of us are very focused on what our friends are doing, what our peers are doing, what other moms are doing. Being a parent of a child with special needs, I had to stop looking sideways because every time I look sideways, I would realize that I am not in the same line with them. I’d probably behind! Zachary’s language development was always behind, his cognitive development is behind. I shouldn’t even say behind, it’s on his own time, right? But if I compare it to other 13 year olds, he’s not functioning at the same level as another 13 year old. He may be functioning at a 9 or 10 year old level. And by stopping myself from comparing it to others, I had to start learning to mind my own business. My business at that time was helping Zachary to be the best of him. It still is. It required me to stop looking right and stop looking left. I know some of you guys do that with me. I’m being blatantly honest, I have friends that may see the book, they may see me speaking, that means seeing all these things on the outside and being like “Ooh, I want to do that!” or “I’m not at that level so I’m just not gonna do it.” And I’m always like, “don’t look at me! You don’t know where I started from. You don’t know what I did. You don’t know what I’m still doing. Just focus on you. And if you’re looking at me, look at me in other words of how can I learn and grow? What can I borrow, use, ask for, create and then modify?” Focus on how is it that you can take what your dream is, your vision, your passion, your parenting to your own pace and your own level with the influence of others. We don’t want to be looking sideways, because when I look sideways, it slows me down for the forward movement.
I want you to realize how that impacts your business, whether it’s your personal business, your parenting business, and or your entrepreneurship business. I can’t wait to speak more about this at Mompreneurs on Fire 2.0, which is my two day live event happening March 28-29 2020 with mompreneurs or other aspiring mompreneurs who are gathering together to ignite their passion and purpose. They ignite better parenting skills and they ignite their profit and prosperity. Like how do you use that thing that you do so well and go out there and make some money off of it? It’s a time for us to be with other people who are in the forward movement so we can learn from them, but not focus on what they’re doing more than what we are doing. It’s that time where I specifically created time for us to be in alignment with where it is that we want to be as an individual, create a strategic plan, and then go out there and get it with support and accountability. That’s what that’s all about. Head over to www.mompreneursonfire.com to reserve your spot!
Tip #3: Invest in yourself.
The last thing I had to learn on, and this kind of leads into the same thing, is learning more how to invest in myself. I’m getting on a plane, investing in coaching, investing in masterminds, investing in all of these programs that have elevated my life to such an exponential level, including the ability to just jump on podcasts with you guys, or to speak, or to be an author, or to help parents. All of that required me investing in more and that’s my whole gamut towards success. It’s how I choose to use my time, my money, and my energy and learning how to maximize that in whatever aspect I have – whether I don’t have enough time, or I don’t have enough money, or I don’t have enough energy. In my head sometimes I’m saying “enough!” and that’s what you may be thinking too – “I don’t have enough. I don’t have enough money. I don’t know where I’m gonna find the time. Girl, I’m so tired. There’s nothing else I can do. That’s time, money and energy.” By the way, we all have some. We all have the ability to find some. Like if you were to say that today’s your last day and you need to find $5,000 so that you can live for another 50 years, you would go out there and make it happen, right? If you needed to know that you had to maximize this two hours so that you can now put some time into finding out what is the cure to something your mom or your son or your family may have, you use that time to create what you need to have. You’ll make that time, right? And then if you’re tired and you’re in that gym class and you just want to give up on yourself and you’re almost on the floor, but then you realize that if I worked out 15 more minutes it would make me live 15 more years – I bet your tail would get up and give yourself 15 more minutes! It’s learning how to find the importance and the why behind the creating the time, creating the money, creating the energy so that you can maximize what it is that you can get. And as for those excuses… I’m sorry, they lack, I’m not taking it. I’m not even having you give it to me. If you come to Mompreneurs on Fire 2.0, I’m going to just let you know that ain’t gonna work. I have all the excuses, and I’ve heard all the excuses, and I’ve pretty much used all of them. So we’ll be in the same boat. Maximize it for 2020.
So these are some of the things that I had to learn along the way, and I hope throughout this process that you are writing this down, that you are leaving your messages in the comments below, that you by now you’ve sent a friend over here to read this, because sometimes we just have to learn how to mind our own damn business! For more business tips and tricks, autism parenting resources, free gifts, and more, take a look around at www.draligriffith.com.
Check out some of my other recent blog posts for more advice!
Autism and Bullying: 3 Au-mazing Tips to Protect Your Child
3 Au-mazing Tips for School Wins